When by some Miracle of Miracles...

Still raw. Did I make a huge mistake?



Look at how he looks at her
Will someone ever I look at me that way-
Full of all the feelings and the soft
Unspoken words that lovers say?
I thought that I knew ev'ry single
Look and sweet expression on his face,
Yet this is one that I don't recognize,
Although I've sat and studied him for hours.
But now I see how love completely occupies
A pair of' eyes...

See the way' they gaze at her,
Like slaves they follow every where she goes.
Do my eyes forget themselves
And do I ever look at him
And smile in such a way
That what I'm feeling shows?
Sometimes I have the feeling
Everybody knows...
And even though it's crazy,
Still I can't help wondering
If I'll ever live to see the day
When by some miracle of miracles,
He'll turn around
And look at me that way!

Anyone Can Whistle

Anyone can whistle
That's what they say -
Easy.
Anyone can whistle
Any old day -
Easy.
It's all so simple:
Relax, let go, let fly.
So someone tell me why
Can't I?

I can dance a tango,
I can read Greek -
Easy.
I can slay a dragon
Any old week -
Easy.

What's hard is simple.
What's natural comes hard.
Maybe you could show me
How to let go,
Lower my guard,
Learn to be free.
Maybe if you whistle,
Whistle for me.

Who knew this was a Stephen Sondheim song? I sure didn't! And after seeing him -- the Dalai Lama of Musical Theater -- last week at The Colony with all my ANMT brethren (my god, what a moment in time... I'll never forget that day!)... how could I not know that song and show? Hm... just another instance of something "typical" that I don't know.

I've had the song on cassette tape that Kevin Schaeffer made me when Shaun and I broke up and it never meant anything to me. Just cute.

But today -- this week -- these past few weeks... it hits me hard:

I don't know ANYTHING about really falling in love. And that not easy to take when you're this side of the proverbial hill.

Well... live and learn. :) I have to be okay with not knowing everything, don't I?

Last night at the Bodhi Tree I let a book "fall off the shelf" -- you know, gather wisdom from whatever happens to catch your eyeball. Well, it just happened to be Marianne Williamson's The Age of Miracles: Embracing the New Midlife. How's that for copacetic?

Then I opened a chapter where she was talking about making up all these excuses for why she couldn't be with this very much younger man because "why would he want to be with someone like her" who couldn't give him children, who was so much older, etc. etc. etc. (apologies to Marianne for not quoting her well).

AAGH. Just hit it all on the head and my insanity these for these past few weeks... and then I finally read something like AGE DOESN'T MATTER -- WE'RE ALL SPIRIT.

It totally calmed me down.

I forgot.

Spirit has no age. I won't forget again.